Philosophy of The Big Society

David Cameron gets to be God!

Monday, 24 November 2008

Been There and Done where's me t shirt?

I think I might have a t shirt obsession. Another one to add to the collection!!!

In spite of virus, and almost going freak out in the taxi on the way, I got to the radio hour early.

Dr Jekyll, kindly, accompanied me. I was impressed by his efforts as he suffers severe paranoia and going to places he doesn't know aggrevates paranoid states in him. So fair play to Dr J, I say!

Got a nice mug of tea from the receptionist whilst the pair of us sat and read the magazines (which varied from Trainspotting to Disability Rights).

I was ushered through to the recording room around 11.20. Dr J declined to go with me and headed off for a ciggie. It wasn't at all what I expected. I thought I was actually going to be interviewed by a person in the same room as me. Whilst I waited to be connected through to other people (those interviewing and Seanean being interviewed, somewhere else)I looked around the room. Was a bit bizarre, there were boxes and mikes and some kind of telephone system on the desk in front of me and to the side of me some sort of storage system and a kid's trike. That struck me as novel and I told the receptionist that if I got bored, waiting to go on air, I could always whizz round the room on that.

I haven't got a clue whether I said anything that anyone else might find relevant. I was asked, at one point, to move back from the mike. I haven't got the daintiest of voices and was most probably bellowing out (apologies to those involved for any perforated ear drums).

I hadn't prepared (wasn't even sure what to prepare for) so winged in responded to questions with whatever came to mind at the time. That most probably suited me better. I had kinda put the interview to the back of my mind...and more so because wasn't even sure I would be up to it on the day. With mental illness there aren't always obvious triggers for not being able to handle things on a particular day and my physical state hasn't been condusive to proactive involvement in things outside my comfort zone. I consider it an achievement to have got there and without having severe panic attacks before, during or after.

The experience was quite interesting to me. Having a kind of 3 way convo...although I would have much preferred to have someone in the room asking me the questions. I did feel like I could have been talking to people from a space base on Mars (most likely came across that way too...good luck to whoever is doing the editing) but wasn't really that spooked by it. I actually found it a bit comical.

For those interested in listening to my warblings the Radio 4 Programme will go out on Tuesday, December 2nd at 21.00 hours, repeated on Wednesday, December 3rd at 16.30The podcast will be available on the link below:

So now, home and back to my reality, which consists of a rather abrupt letter from the local council, informing me they have stopped my housing benefit until they get a letter from me explaining when I stopped getting tax credits and child benefit. Even though the tax office informed them of those dates, already...and the formal request for a letter from Em's uni confirming she is a student there. I could get worried about this but I am not. The way I see it, these systems are incompetent and run by people who appear incompetent and if push comes to shove I will ask them why they have to pressure people with illness over piss poor communications between government departments. Obviously, I will do that in a manner befitting formal communications (will swap 'piss poor' for inadequate).

And it is time for a cuppa, a cig and a slob out to some tunes. Thanks, again, to Dr J, I now know how to download songs on to my MP3 Player. My favourite is Michael Jackson's 'Stranger in Moscow' (which bares some relevance to how I felt in that studio room today) but is not allowed to be embedded from You tube so have gone for this. Which is Pink doing it for us girls who go, for reasons that may well be our own destruction, for relevant others who don't come with fancy cars and talk to match!!!


  1. Yay, congratulations! I'm sure you did briliantly, and i'm looking forward to hearing it when it goes out. :o)

  2. Well done Mandy,
    looking forward to listening too. did you not hqave an interviewer then and were you and Seaneen at same place? Did you meet any other mentally challenged folk?

  3. well done!

    Will be listening in...

  4. manders,

    Well done for getting there and doing your bit for queen and country and glad you were able to take it in your stride rather than it being stressy - and well done for Dr J for supporting role too .i'm just sorry there's no pic of you on that trike ..that would have made an excellent cover for the Radio Times :)

    Will listen out for the prog

  5. Well Done - Will listen in of course.

  6. Thanks folks.

    I didn't get to meet Seanean. It was me in a room (with a trike) connected, via some media technology, to Seanean and the two interviewers.

    Actually, it was quite surreal but I did enjoy it although I wouldn't do it again. Not because it was bad cos it was rather good but because I prefer to do my own thing and that is one of the reasons I like blogging so much.

    Hope, when you listen, you aren't all disappointed. I don't think I said anything that thrilling or gripping.

    Perhaps I was too laid back. If I had been on a manic one that could have been very entertaining or irritating dependant on what people want. Ha! Ha!

  7. Delusions are bad and mentally ill people should be freed from them right? Well, not quite Steve Pack thought.Forbidden knowledge is supposed to have gone out with the Ark. Few of us take kindly to being told that there are things we should not be able to discuss or challenge.Being a nurse I always presumed part of my remit was to put patients' welfare first. But a recent occurrence involving a client, myself and a ward psychiatrist new to both of us, has made me think again.


  8. Gillberk

    If to Spam or not to Spam is the question?

    My answer is don't Spam, here.

  9. I only found your blog today, via Seaneen and Aethelread. Have been reading with interest about your appearance on All in the Mind. Glad it was a good experience. I know exactly what you mean about it being hard to commit to stuff outside your comfort zone. But sounds like you did really well.

  10. Thanks Zoe

    Glad you found my blog :>)