I'll Tell You What I Want, What I Really Really Want

And it doesn't involve any zig a zig arring!

Prompted by having read Mad Dentist's latest posting..which I can relate to in some ways. Not all but some. If someone with the power to actually act on asking me the question "What do you want?, went and asked me that question, my response would be I want to go dancing, not in some nightclub heaving with drunken bodies desiring attention (and mainly in the bedroom department). I want to dance somewhere with space enough to move around freely in but not too big to get lost in. I want to dance in a place where everyone isn't posing about and I can girate away in ways that appeal to me rather than a mass audience. But rather than dance at home, which I do alot, I would like to dance amongst other people who like to dance too.

I would have to go with someone who is not going to fekk off mid evening, either looking for a shag, to get a fix or somewhere to bring up the insides of their stomach and I would also like to get home safely.

Now in this day and age, finding a place to dance (without all that ruddy interferance) is one thing but finding someone who is trustworthy to go, spend the evening, and come home with (and not have to give bits of the self that one would rather not) is rarer than finding a winning Euro Lottery ticket on the pavement!!!

Maybe my view of human nature is bleak but I have sussed in this life that it is all about the payback and if what I have on offer isn't bona fide tender or the kind of tender somebody else wants, then I am stuffed.

Yep, who needs Paxo after all?

Okay, so I have totally gone away from the tangent Mr Mad Dentist was working from but is quite rare that people are asked what they want. Either by friends or by MH services. Is more a case of - this is what is on offer, if it doesn't match your needs - Tough shitski. Yep, you can apply for a Direct Payment for what you actually want but unless you are the bureaucratic equivalent of a trick cyclist, then give up before you hit the small print!

So back from my trip to fantasy land. I have my first visit from the new trainee something or other, based with my Community Mental Health Team, tomorrow. When my care co-ordinator asked me what I wanted them to do with and for me. I said "Positive distraction therapy". Perhaps they will turn up in a tutu and give me some ballet lessons. I dunno but whatever it is, I hope it is better than providing me with a handful of leaflets on understanding anxiety!!!!

Quick by-line about the Local Resolution Meeting. In spite of getting up feeling the heebies, I bussed to town. Met the advocate. Sweet chap who had left his cigs at home, so the pair of us were puffing away on menthols outside the NHS car park.

The meeting went okay. Apologies for me being sent on wild goose chases were given, the procedures on how blood test results are provided to patients were clarified, although the procedures were not applied in my case. Hence, assurances that additions to those procedures are now in place. Something written into discharge letters confirming where the blood test results are being sent..also confirmation that patients will be notified when blood tests are done on how/where they get the results.

I raised concerns, based around respect, and said that I thought there was at least, in part, a staff training issue in regards to how patients are dealt with. Was told that it is a cultural issue (not as in ethnic background cultures) but the culture of the organisation and that needs to change. Yes it does! The rather slap dash approach to dealing with patients is not okay. People being listened to and then what they ask for being acted on is what it should be about. Okay, so I could ask for a cream cake but I know that is not what the NHS provides but if I ask for my blood test results, the very first person I come into contact with should treat me with respect and act on what I am saying. They may not have the blood test results. They might not be the right person to be giving me the blood test results but it isn't that difficult to say "I am afraid I am not the person you need to talk to. The person you need to talk to is.......and they are contactable via......." either that or "I don't have the information but I will find out who has and get back to you". Is not that hard to do....is it? Well, it shouldn't be.

A review of complaints (as in reflecting back and looking for running themes and root causes) is taking place. It is called something like "Learning from mistakes". Could it be, at last, someone in a position of power is clocking how important that is? Gotta live in hope. I said I would be interested to see how that pans out. Okay, so maybe that was cheeky of me but so what, I am a service user with a vested interest in what the Trust does. Cos ultimately it affects me (as well as other people).

I was asked if I would be interested in being involved in some way...I said I am happy to look at things...for things to be sent through to me and happy to share my views and send them back..but not prepared to attend meetings. Not just because I have travel problems but the sort of meetings I have attended in the past have led nowhere of any benefit to me. As in I have seen no positive change for service users from attending them and so I don't want to go back down that road.

After the meeting, the advocate and I exchanged a view that meeting went as well as it could and I said that if the minutes are a true reflection of what was discussed and include those areas of improvement that the Trust rep said were in place, then I would see that as closure for me and not take the complaint to The Healtchare Commission.

I do still have an outstanding complaint regarding the effectiveness and relevance (NON) of The Emergency Duty Team (particularly for people who suffer mental illness and are in crisis) but I am going to have a week or so of unwinding, before I decide what route I am going to take with that but I think, because it relates to Social Services, it will have to go to some Ombudsman or other. It can wait a while.

Time now for chocolate!!!